Rituals for the Rough Nights to let go the old & welcome the new

The Rough Nights begin on the night of December 24th to 25th. Perhaps you’ve heard of them before? I know them from my grandma, but only now am I beginning to understand their significance. The nights leading up to Epiphany on January 6 are often perceived as magical or even mystical. It’s the time when it gets quiet. When we (should) come to rest. When we can let go of the old and prepare for the new.

The Rauhnächte are an old European tradition. According to lore, it was believed that spirits, witches and other supernatural beings were particularly active during this time. People used various rituals to protect themselves from “evil”, to take a look into the future and to escape the darkness. They burned incense, set up protective symbols, interpreted oracles or dreams and lit candles. These rituals still differ from region to region today.

Why is it exactly 12 nights?

It feels like the world really does turn a little slower “between the years”. It is said that the boundaries between the spiritual and physical worlds become blurred during this transitional period. This is not so surprising when you think back to the roots of the Rough Nights. After all, they go back to the change from the lunar to the solar calendar. The lunar year is 354 days long, whereas the solar year is the familiar 365, leaving exactly 11 days and 12 nights “left over”, the so-called Rough Nights.

The spiritual meaning of the Rough Nights

The Rough Nights have a spiritual meaning for many people. This is individual and can take different forms from person to person. Essentially, it is about reflecting, consciously taking time for yourself, looking inwards at your own wishes and goals and opening your mind. Asking yourself questions such as “What do I want to leave behind in the old year? What do I want to take with me into the new year? What do I wish for? What have I experienced this year? What made me happy? What have I learned?”. Rituals during the Rough Nights are a way of counteracting the faster-faster-further of our time and giving space to slowness. So you can celebrate the time between the old and the new year in your very own way.

Modern rituals for the Rough Nights

There are rituals such as burning incense that are still very popular. Lighting candles is perhaps not as important today as it used to be, when there was no electric light and a candle was the only escape from the long hours of darkness. Although, come to think of it, nothing beats a relaxing candlelit bath! I’ve put together a few rituals to inspire you. They include a few traditional rituals, such as burning the 13 wishes, but also a few “self-care rituals” that fit well into this time. You can incorporate them into your everyday life during the Rough Nights and celebrate them according to your own rhythm and preferences.

Burning 13 wishes

You write 13 wishes for the next year individually on small pieces of paper that you fold up. Every evening, you blindly draw one of these slips of paper and burn it. Figuratively speaking, at this moment you hand over your wish to the “higher powers”, who should now ensure that it comes true. As there are only 12 nights, one piece of paper remains. This is the only one that you read out loud and you are “responsible” for its possible fulfillment in the coming year. (Please be very careful when burning it and handle the fire responsibly!).

Idea: Burn a wish every evening at a fixed time & sip a cup of your favorite tea.

Consciously take time for yoga

During the Rough Nights, relaxing yoga exercises help you to center your body and mind, reduce stress and find inner peace, which is very important during this transitional period. Especially if you feel restless or driven - the Christmas season is also hectic and stressful for many - gentle yoga is a good way to calm down and make space for clear thoughts.

Idea: Meditative yin yoga not only calms your mind, the gentle stretches also allow your body to let go of stress. 20-30 minutes per session is enough.

Reflection on the past year

The year always feels like a snap of the fingers at the end. I often hear myself thinking “Where has the year gone already?”. One year, 365 days in which so much has happened. And yet we find it difficult to remember all the wonderful moments ad hoc - especially all the little ones. This is precisely why reflection is so important. Looking back on the past year allows us to enjoy the highlights once again, learn from our experiences, proudly acknowledge what we have achieved and identify challenges that will probably continue to accompany us in the new year.

Idea: Look at your photos or browse through your diary & write down your personal highlights of the year.

Write down goals for the new year

Those who have no goals wander aimlessly through a world that suggests to us that anything is possible. But freedom also needs guidance, because the flip side of “Anything is possible!” is “I don’t know where to start!”. Most of us have too many topics, too many tasks, too many interests, too many things to pack into a limited amount of time. Setting clear goals and wishes for the coming year helps us not to lose focus and to create a vision for personal development.

Idea: If the coming year were a book, what title would you give it? (Tip: Take a look at your 13 wishes - do you see a connection?)

Connection to nature

Time in nature is just the right thing to sort out your thoughts, reflect and take a deep breath! The connection to Mother Earth is particularly important during the Rough Nights, as it allows us to focus on the essentials. It helps us to perceive the here and now and thus distinguish the important from the unimportant. If you live in a big city and nature is not just around the corner, you can also connect with nature in other ways, e.g. through aromatherapy, natural cosmetics, a visit to the sauna or the planetarium.

Idea: Go for a long walk in the woods - preferably alone or with someone with whom you can be silent together.

Burn incense & cleanse

There are countless ways to burn incense, e.g. with incense sticks, resin, white sage or other herbs. By burning incense, you free yourself and your home from negative energies, emotions and blockages. This purified environment creates space for new ideas, clarity and creativity.

Idea: Make your own smudge sticks for the Rough Nights. These are bundles of incense made from various fresh herbs and flowers. The best known is white sage. The sticks must be completely dry before you can burn them. You can of course also buy them pre-tied. Light the smudge stick, blow it out immediately and cleanse your home bit by bit with the resulting smoke. For even more intensive “cleaning”, you can spread the smoke around the room with a feather.

(Dream) journaling

You should pay particular attention to your dreams during the Rough Nights, as they can feel more intense and clear during this time. It is said that each night represents a month of the new year and we can ‘catch’ a glimpse of the future through our dreams. So the night of December 24th to 25th is said to represent January, the night of December 25th to 26th February and so on. As dreams are often fleeting, you should write them down in a dream journal as soon as possible in the morning. If you can’t remember a specific dream, at least make a note of the feeling you perceived when you woke up. In general, journaling is a great ritual for self-reflection and conscious awareness.

Idea: Put a journal or pad next to your bed and grab a pen first thing in the morning to write down your dream or feeling.

Ensure good sleep quality

Reflection needs a clear mind. And a clear mind needs restful sleep. If you want to start the new year clear and focused, you should pay particular attention to your sleep during the Rough Nights. You can also use this time to find out what you need in order to sleep well and restfully.

Idea: Create a calming evening ritual for this time that you have just for yourself. Elements could be: Reading a book, yoga, meditation, journaling, drinking tea, relaxing bath, self-care, breathing exercises, lighting candles, sleeping in your favorite bedding, evening walk.

Wellness for body & mind

Whether it’s a day at the spa or a wellness ritual at home: Take time for yourself! Massages, relaxing baths, body scrubs, face masks, sauna - all these wonderful rituals help us to let go and relax.

Idea: Book a massage during the Rough Nights. The firm grips let you feel your body and your mind can let go. Your thoughts can wander subconsciously without you controlling or noticing them. This is not only super relaxing, but also promotes our creativity.

Aromatherapy at home

We don’t go out as much in winter as we do in summer. We lack light and the sun rarely shows itself. Aromatherapy brings nature into your home and creates an atmosphere in which you can feel good. There are essential oils for every mood. Citrus fruits put you in a good mood, herbs cleanse, flowers relax, woods provide balance. You can use them in many different ways, e.g. in a diffusor, a body oil or a relaxing bath.

Idea: Bergamot gives us light when we need it most. In aromatherapy, it is therefore used for mood swings, excessive demands, stress or depressive moods. If you drip 1-2 drops of essential oil into the palm of your hand, rub it in a clockwise direction and breathe in deeply, you can escape the darkness for a moment. This is also a great sleeping ritual!

Clean up - espacially digitally

Cleaning up creates clarity, which is why the time of the Rauhnächte is ideal for this. What is meant by this is tidying up rather than clearing out properly (as this is said to bring bad luck). This is by no means limited to the physical world. All kinds of ‘data garbage’ also accumulates in the digital world over the course of the year, which could benefit from some tidying up. Not only will you be able to put things behind you and start the new year in a tidy state, but you will also create space for new ideas.

Idea: Maybe you’re one of those people whose desktop looks more like a library of screenshots and files? Use this time to tidy up your downloads, your desktop, your notes and/or your email inbox.

Oracle playfully

There is a very popular New Year’s Eve ritual that has its origins in the Rough Nights: pouring lead. You don’t have to believe in oracles. It’s just fun to interpret the cast symbols to discover hidden messages or possible clues about the coming year.

Idea: Pouring lead is not particularly sustainable or healthy. Good alternatives are pouring wax or reading coffee grounds.

Affirmations & manifestation

Writing things down is important, believing in them is even more important. Positive affirmations help us to develop and strengthen this belief. It is about believing in ourselves and in manifesting our personal development, goals and desires - in other words, consciously perceiving them and bringing them into our lives. Only in this way can they become “real” and lose their abstraction.

Idea: Derive positive self-affirmations from your goals and wishes for the new year and internalize them. For example: I wish I had more time for myself. → I consciously make time for things I enjoy and that are good for me.

I wish you much joy with the rituals and hope that you can use the time of the Rough Nights positively for yourself.